individuality has been stripped from you in order that you be managed - Professor MacIsaac

I'm trying something new here, blogging about my vlogs. It's something Charlie (of charlieissocoollike fame) does, and I think it's a pretty good idea. We'll how it goes.

I wanted to go into a little bit more detail about my first class. One of the other things that my prof, Professor MacIsaac, said was, (and I quote) "All individuality has been stripped from you in order that you be managed." This is not okay. This is the fault of the beaurocracy, and this is how computers run our lives. I am a number, in both the Canadian and American school systems (because I took an American standardized test in the spring). I am compartmentalised into a number and a letter grade, in order that the people who are important (my superiors in the university, my future employers, all the way up to the government) can fully understand who I am. But this is not true! I am more than a number and a letter grade, and that is why I am taking this course. I'm basically taking a great books course, where we will study primary texts and try to understand the world as it is.

The difference between science now, and science before the Enlightenment in Europe, is that we now want to understand how the world works and how we can change it to better serve our desires, whereas before the Enlightenment, people wanted to understand how the world works in order that they might understand what it means to be human in this place we call home. That is why it didn't matter about things like nuclear fission etc. Science was no more practical than philosophy, and sometimes the lines between the two blurred.

And I'd really like to have lived then, even if, as a woman, I wouldn't have been allowed to participate in the excitement that was the new discoveries.

Secondly, I'd like to state: I am usually pretty good at directions, but I am totally lost on campus. I wouldn't even be able to find my classes without Alanna's help. But I'm really excited to be out on my own in Ottawa, and I'm sure I'll get better at finding my way around, soon.

And now, I am going to go be social, because there are two interesting people behind me who I am ignoring that I should talk to.

DFTBA,
jr

These are hard times. The world hurts. We live in fear and forget to walk with hope. But hope has not forgotten you. So ask it to dinner...

It's probably hungry, and would appreciate the invitation. - Libba Bray

I've been lost more times than I can count today. I tried, and failed, to find the library. I got lost trying to find the bus stop off campus. I almost got lost on the way to the grocery store, and I tried to go in the wrong door to my residence building.

It's hard to imagine that in a year or two I'll know this place like the back of my hand. Right now, everything looks the same. All the building are the same ugly '70s style. All the pathways look the same. The only reason I can find my building at all is because it's near (but not beside) the construction. Argh!

But I now know how to get to the grocery store which is also my bank, and that's important. Alanna and I are going to the bookstore tomorrow, and that'll be good. I know where that is - I bused past it this afternoon. We're getting up early to beat the crowds.

And then on Thursday, classes start! I'll be sure to post something about that then.

DFTBA
jr

Hello world! I'm gonna get you! - Lord Voldemort (A Very Potter Musical version)

Seriously, though, I thought it'd be different.

I was all excited about going away to university, and now here I am, at university, and all I can say is I'm bored out of my tree. I mean, classes don't start 'til Wednesady, I have no friends, and there's really only so much time you can spend on the internet and reading books. I went out to play beach volleyball today with my sister because I wanted to get out so bad.

I guess I shouldn't complain, though. The weather hasn't been great, so I explored the tunnels for a while last night. Once classes start then I'm sure I'll have more to do. I just thought I'd feel different when I moved away. I don't.

DFTBA
jr

Holy barking spiders - Scott Westerfeld

You know what I love? I love steampunk. If I could, I'd dress in steampunk costume every day. Unfortunately, for the next approximately 60 hours I live in a small town where that sort of shenanigans is neither tolerated nor possible.

For example: There is a small antique type store downtown. In the window right now is a gorgeous black dress that is just begging me to alter it slightly (it looks like it'd be way too big) and wear is around. It's hard to describe, but it's very steampunk, and with the addition of a bit of clockwork here and there, it could be the very beginning of my steampunk wardrobe. But it's sold. I would pay large amounts of money to buy that dress, and it's sold. I nearly cried when I saw the tag that said so.

However, on Saturday I'm moving to this nation's capital, and there maybe I can find/create some pwnawesome steampunk costumes. I still need to learn how to sew well, but that will come with time.

On a side note, this week marks a few important dates, and I'm sorry that I didn't post them earlier: yesterday was the launch of A Very Charming Vlog, my latest vlogging project. www.youtube.com/averycharmingvlog. Also, tomorrow is the launch of Rosethorn, a Harry Potter fanfic-type blog that I am sharing with my friend Eoin. I will probably post the first post in the morning. www.scorpiusnrose.blogspot.com, if you're interested.

That is all for today,
DFTBA
jr

It smells like rain and laughter and the unexpected - Libba Bray

http://s3.amazonaws.com/data.tumblr.com/tumblr_l782c2YCEZ1qbl0ayo1_1280.jpg?AWSAccessKeyId=0RYTHV9YYQ4W5Q3HQMG2&Expires=1282102395&Signature=ndhKMfr7ISvEUsg5CgduG3vm6w4%3D

This secret bothers me. Not because the person loves John Green's books, or because they think that they are better than anyone else's. I tend to agree.

It bothers me, I guess, because it's the opposite reaction I had toward John's books. I read John's books, and they showed me how much more I can love books. Since I read Looking for Alaska, I have read and reread books at a faster rate than ever before in my life.

I guess what really bothers me most, is that reading a good book shouldn't make you afraid to read other books. Read a good book is just one step on the way to reading lots of good books, if that makes any sense. And yeah, not all books you read will be very good, and maybe you won't read another book you like as much as John's. But you should still look!

Being human is an excuse for just about everything, but it also kind of sucks in a way – Frank Portman

So, I'm sitting at my desk, watching YouTube videos (because I'm about two weeks behind) (yeah, that's right, I caught up about two weeks of videos in the last three days, and when you're subscribed to the amount of very verbose people that I am, that's quite a feat). For this post to make sense, I first should tell you the layout of my bedroom.

It's a very small bedroom. When you come in the door, my bed is about two feet to the left, and then at the other end of my bed is a little drawer thing, and that's about a foot wide, and it's sandwiched in beside my desk, which is right beside the wall. Right by my desk is my window, which is open (for some reason) and it's rather breezy outside my window today. On the right side of my bedroom is my bookshelf and my closet, both of which are quite full but will be quite empty soon.

The reason why I tell you this, is because my curtain keeps getting blown into my face, and then my shoulder gets cold, because the cool breeze blows right onto it. It's rather chilly outside today (it's only 24 degrees Celsius), and I'm wearing a strapless top right now. So it's quite problematic. But instead of standing up and a) closing my window or b) switching it so it's open on the other side, I just sit here and suffer.

And this is why I tell you this story: either I'm a masochist, or I'm ridiculously lazy, and I know I'm not a masochist. I could tell you that I'm totally engrossed in my video-watching, but that'd be a lie. I am actually rather bored - I meant to hang out with my parents today, but then they went out to see my grandparents and from there are going out for dinner, and I stayed home because I'm not invited to the dinner. So, we are left with the option that I am, in fact, ridiculously lazy.

I just thought you'd all like to know that. Since you're all in my head anyway, I can blog about whatever I want, and no one can critisize me for being a boring blogger. Which is probably why no one reads this.

DFTBA
JR

Breathing comes in pairs / except for twice / one begins and one’s goodbye – The Fray

Now I would like to rage against the world for a moment:

Until almost two years ago, I'd never really experienced death. I'd never had anyone close to me die. My Oma died just before I started high school, but that doesn't really count, because she had Altzheimer's, and wasn't really living anymore, anyway. Almost two years ago, Geoffrey died from cancer at fifteen. That was devastating, and I almost didn't get over it. I almost didn't make it through the first year, because of various crap. Geoffrey's death was the trigger, the tipping point, I guess.

In the last year, five of my classmates have died or been killed. I didn't know any of them, I don't think I'd ever talked to any of them, and I didn't even know most of their names. But it's still not fair!

My class has always been very different than any other class, even in elementary school. For the most part, we are intelligent people. Sure, there are stupid people, people who make poor decisions. But we are all people who can make a difference in the world - people who can succeed if we want to. We've mostly managed to rise above stupid drama, I think (or, I might just be really good at ignoring it). But five people in one year? And one of my good friends the year before that? How does death all of a sudden become part of life? I don't understand.

This is why I shaved my head - so that other people wouldn't have to go through the same thing that I did with Geoffrey. The most recent death, a girl named Taylor, was best friends with the girl whose locker was next to mine for our four years at high school, so I sort of knew who she was. Knowing that Sara now has to live on without her best friend breaks my heart, even if I don't know or like either of them. It's times like this that I feel like I'm not doing anything. Like shaving my head was a useless excerise. I know that a motorcycle accident is much different than cancer, but...I still feel that way.

And then I remember that the man in my church who flew out to Calgary to have surgery for cancer that had spread all over his body is home, and doing well, and I think that maybe I've helped after all. Maybe the seven thousand dollars that we raised last summer are helping Andy to keep his dad. Maybe.

DFTBA
jr